One of the things I dislike about Lemmy is that while people do tend to stand up for trans rights and other rights, people come out of the woodwork MUH FREEZE PEACH about using the R word. “I SHOULD BE ABLE TO USE OFFENSIVE LANGUGE!!!”
It’s such a terrible look and it makes me sad that they refuse to understand the harm the word causes. The people to whom it refers know the word well. They don’t like it.
People give all sorts of excuses on why it should be okay to use. But these same people wouldn’t use “colored” to refer to black people. That word used to be preferred but now is not. They don’t bring out the euphemism treadmill bullshit to defend using “colored”, but just like some people with developmental and cognitive disabilities still have a medical diagnosis (officially) of MR (Mental Retardation), for example, the NAACP still has that “C” for “Colored”. That doesn’t make the work okay to use. And meanings shifting over time doesn’t make “Colored” okay to use, nor does it make “retarded” okay to use either.
They can say all they want, but it is either blind ignorance of the harm, or willful ignorance to keep using an abelist slur just because they apparently like the word so much and can’t be bothered to find better ones that are NOT harmful.
I do get it. When I went through the process of removing it from my vocabulary 15-20 years ago, it wasn’t easy. But I did it.
I grew up in 1980s New England. I’m plenty familiar with the word and of course I used it growing up. I had an aunt with Down syndrome, one cousin with cerebral palsy, another with Rett syndrome. All awesome humans. Once I was an adult, it was just like…why the fuck would I use that word? These are people I love dearly.
Sure, maybe if we’re ranking insensitive slurs, it isn’t top of the list. I guess? And it’s an easy one to hold on to because it’s a group that isn’t generally in a position to speak up for themselves. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to do better.
I worked as a supported living coach helping adults with cognitive and developmental disabilities develop life skills. Or at least, that was the theory. In practice, most of my clients were on the lower side of enough functioning to truly live fully independently, although some did and were perfect for the program. But my wife taught at an adult day school focused on arts, and taught her students Shakespeare. And they fully understood. I’ve listened to full-on discussions of Shakespeare’s plays where it was clear her class fully understood.
If any group of people deserve an epithet less… I’m sure there are many who deserve it equally as little, but I’m not sure of any that deserve it any less than they do. lol.
One of the things I dislike about Lemmy is that while people do tend to stand up for trans rights and other rights, people come out of the woodwork MUH FREEZE PEACH about using the R word. “I SHOULD BE ABLE TO USE OFFENSIVE LANGUGE!!!”
It’s such a terrible look and it makes me sad that they refuse to understand the harm the word causes. The people to whom it refers know the word well. They don’t like it.
People give all sorts of excuses on why it should be okay to use. But these same people wouldn’t use “colored” to refer to black people. That word used to be preferred but now is not. They don’t bring out the euphemism treadmill bullshit to defend using “colored”, but just like some people with developmental and cognitive disabilities still have a medical diagnosis (officially) of MR (Mental Retardation), for example, the NAACP still has that “C” for “Colored”. That doesn’t make the work okay to use. And meanings shifting over time doesn’t make “Colored” okay to use, nor does it make “retarded” okay to use either.
They can say all they want, but it is either blind ignorance of the harm, or willful ignorance to keep using an abelist slur just because they apparently like the word so much and can’t be bothered to find better ones that are NOT harmful.
I do get it. When I went through the process of removing it from my vocabulary 15-20 years ago, it wasn’t easy. But I did it.
I appreciate your post!
I grew up in 1980s New England. I’m plenty familiar with the word and of course I used it growing up. I had an aunt with Down syndrome, one cousin with cerebral palsy, another with Rett syndrome. All awesome humans. Once I was an adult, it was just like…why the fuck would I use that word? These are people I love dearly.
Sure, maybe if we’re ranking insensitive slurs, it isn’t top of the list. I guess? And it’s an easy one to hold on to because it’s a group that isn’t generally in a position to speak up for themselves. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try to do better.
I worked as a supported living coach helping adults with cognitive and developmental disabilities develop life skills. Or at least, that was the theory. In practice, most of my clients were on the lower side of enough functioning to truly live fully independently, although some did and were perfect for the program. But my wife taught at an adult day school focused on arts, and taught her students Shakespeare. And they fully understood. I’ve listened to full-on discussions of Shakespeare’s plays where it was clear her class fully understood.
If any group of people deserve an epithet less… I’m sure there are many who deserve it equally as little, but I’m not sure of any that deserve it any less than they do. lol.