“I desperately long for the companionship and camaraderie affiliated with these ice cream socials, but through some cruel form of injustice, I am forced by my body to abstain! If only there were some alternate frozen dessert we could all participate in! But alas! It is plain to see that I am simply not meant to enjoy the finer things in life with my peers, and shall thusly remain in my cubicle, alone, during normal business hours.”
If they were really concerned about him feeling welcome, they would ask what he wants and take it at face value.
“I desperately long for the companionship and camaraderie affiliated with these ice cream socials, but through some cruel form of injustice, I am forced by my body to abstain! If only there were some alternate frozen dessert we could all participate in! But alas! It is plain to see that I am simply not meant to enjoy the finer things in life with my peers, and shall thusly remain in my cubicle, alone, during normal business hours.”